The Right Choice

As a completely comical, unrelated start to this post... my title makes me think of The New Kids on the Block and Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh The right stuff.  Oh Oh oh Oh oh The right stuff. That had absolutely nothing to do with anything.  Sorry.  I was even going to delete that, but then I thought, hey why not, some needed a  laugh..right?  Anyway...

Since I am in a situation that I did not choose, I am often faced with having to make a decision about something that I hate.  When option 1 sounds horrible, but so does option 2.  I don't want to do either one.  But the reality is that the fallout of the consequences of what others have chosen means I have to make a choice.  What I really need to do is figure out how to best love my husband and ultimately honor God with my actions in either option.  I am facing a tough call right now.  I am currently pleading with God to give me direction about a specific upcoming event.  And as of right now, I do not have my answer.

So I'm digging deeper into the emotions at play.  Why is it not easy to make a choice here?  I know that answer.  Now, I am only speaking for how I react and respond.  I am not making across the board assumptions about anybody else, it's just how God has shaped my life.

I am afraid that I am going to make the wrong choice and then what happens?  That this is a test from God...now what am I going to do.  Am I going to make the "right" choice and it will result in my answered prayers.  Or am I going to make the "wrong" choice and as a result, I'll never achieve the level God is waiting for me to get to before he can move the mountains for me.  The reality is that neither choice can be right, there is no clear moral issue - in regards to what I have to choose - that makes it a black & white easy answer.  But my fears have paralyzed me in choosing either one.  So at the root of the problem is my view of who God is and how He actually responds & cares for His children.

God - in His mercy -  is actively working in me to change my wrong, sinful perspective of WHO HE IS!  I am giving myself way too much power & credit & control.  As if I have the power to control what God might do!  Like I might thwart His plan by making the "wrong" choice in this.  My own sinfulness in BIG ME & small God instead of BIG GOD & small me opens my eyes to my own wretchedness & need for my Savior!  God's plan is not dependent on me.  I am called to walk in His ways and be obedient to Him, but He doesn't need me in order to accomplish what He already planned from before the beginning of time.  As God answered Job in Job 38:4 "Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth?  Tell me, if you have understanding."  Ouch.  I am nothing, God is everything.  God is not out to punish me.  In fact, Romans 8:1 "There is therefore no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus."  Oh how I need to pray for the Spirit to infect that truth into every fiber of my being so that I would not just know it my head, but that I would believe it in my heart and live it in my life!

I am so grateful that God is mercifully flushing out of my life the areas where I need to repent and change.  Because He loves me, He is molding me in His image.  And then means I need to have a right view of who He is.  My God is so BIG.  So strong and so mighty.  There's nothing my God can not do. (and yes, I do the actions every time I sing it, who doesn't?!)  I will end with a verse that a treasured friend gave me today that God laid on her heart for me before she knew today's choice to be made.  It truly hits the mark.              John 14:27 "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid."

In Chist's Love,
Kari